Are all your faculties intact for back-to-school?

It’s nearing the end of August, and it’s back to school after six weeks of sun, sea and slobbing about - Well, for kids anyway. For parents, the summer holidays was probably defined by arranging, arguments and a whole heap of antics! It’s not unusual, then, that parents often experience a sense of relief when their kids return to school. However, there are often many issues faced by parents and children, especially if your child is just starting primary or secondary school. I wonder who is the most nervous and excited, you or them?

I remember the many mixed feelings I had when I first started secondary school, and I found it odd how, equally, these feelings of worry and wonder were transposed and relived when it was time for my little sister to take her first steps into primary and secondary school life. For parents, this is a time when your child will come into contact with many different people with different beliefs, and exposed different rules about acceptable behaviour, manners and morals.

But first thing’s first. Getting a child into secondary school is the single biggest educational challenge facing most parents of children of school-starting age. Our school system is exceptionally confusing. The choice is wide – mixed or single sex? local or out-of-town? grammar or comprehensive? Some parents may even need to consider boarding school, or those which cater for special needs, which can be all the more stressful. Parents are required to visit many of these, fill in a multitude of mystifying forms, navigate the pros and cons whilst bearing in mind their children’s own needs and discussing these with them, whilst not losing their minds! Parents feel overwhelmed by the process of finding out what’s available and what suits their child – what’s more, they also need to support child through the process. During this anxious time when children need encouragement and extra confidence, they also need calm parents who don’t fall behind taking notes.

The main thing is to do your homework. Don’t listen to playground gossip and, yes, parents are as susceptible to being drawn into over exaggerated rumours as children. There will be one parent who thinks the school is the best thing since sliced bread, and then another who grants a solid thumbs-down to the school. But in the end it is you who must decide what’s best for your child. Check the Ofsted reports and where they rank on school league tables for exam results. Even if you’re less concerned with the academics, the school prospectus will provide a range of information including sporting activities and other extra-curricular  clubs. Prospectuses are given out at open days, your attendance at these is paramount as to gain some first-hand familiarity with the school.

But it doesn’t stop there! It seems as if you barely get a quick lunch break after you’ve found out your child has been accepted in a school before the school-bells start to ring in your head alerting you to tonnes more stress. There are the usual social and educational stresses: Will your child like going to school? Will they make friends? Will they getting good grades? In addition to this, though, parents and children now-a-days are faced with many other issues, including drug use, violence, self-esteem issues and bullying. However, all these issues can be dealt with by talking with your children at age appropriate times and general communication, which is useful in preventing them as much as possible from picking up bad habits. And for parents who consider their children as argumentative, and constantly rebelling against their wishes, I have some good news for you: Saying ‘no’ doesn’t condemn your child to a life of sex, drugs and rock n’ roll, but rather, such strong-wilfulness may make them in fact less likely to be coerced by demanding peers. Myself and my mother fight like hyenas, but it means that if someone aimed to pressure me into taking drugs or tobacco, I’m able to tell them where to stick it!

Just remember that starting school is exciting. It holds the possibilities of exploring an expanding world and gaining qualifications which will mean your child, running around with chocolate-smeared mouths and underwear on their heads, can grow up to really make an impact on people’s lives. You never know, once you get past all the stress (and you will get past it!), you my even enjoy your child’s time entering the world of education.

Good luck, and feel free to add comments about your own opinions and experiences!